I saw this link (be aware, it is a 6-year-old Atlantic article and is quite long) at the very end of a funny (as always) post by Ms. Smartypants. It's a rather acerbic look at what people consider to be "great modern literature". While it is quite damning in parts, I had to say that I, in large part, agree with the sentiment.
I have only read a few of the books cited -- the author focuses mainly on three types of modern prose and three authors in particular -- but the sentiment struck a chord. Why does "great literature" have to be so densely written and, as is often the case, logically incomprehensible? If you want to wax poetic, there is an entire ocean of writing in which to swim: poetry! Metaphors and colorful descriptions that, while singularly lovely, add nothing to the narrative but allow the author to remind the reader how gifted he or she is at crafting a sentence.
Of course, I am not a literary critic by any means. The last book I started reading was stolen (along with my car, last Friday. God damn it.) but I want to read more, and articles like this one make me feel better about reading "genre" books instead of slogging through something like All the Pretty Horses again. And, as noted above, the article is 6 years old and so may not apply as much to today's literary climate.
September 12, 2007
September 11, 2007
The Most Profound Thought of September 11, 2007, Is As Follows:
Eating a sandwich with both pickles and cucumbers is disturbing on exactly 3 levels.
September 6, 2007
You Know You Like Them
This one is courtesy of the mouse.
1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4. What does it say?
"[it would have wrenched his] soul to have Ethan chosen last for any team. "Why?" Sarah [had asked.]
2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What's there?
The frame of the window.
3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?
Something called "Between the Lions" (I think).
4. Without looking, guess what time it is:
11:25 a.m.
5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?
11:24 a.m. The magic of billable hours makes me pretty good at that game.
6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
The copier, faintly, and a hum outside which may or may not be a rooftop a/c unit.
7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
This morning. Walking from parking to Starbucks.
8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at?
The Guebara v. Allstate case opinion.
9. What are you wearing?
Pants and a shirt. I'm at work, yo.
10. Did you dream last night?
Probably, but I don't remember any of it.
11. When did you last laugh?
About 5 minutes ago when talking about the upcoming Detroit Lions season.
12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
Zilch. I should probably hang up some stuff in here.
13. Seen anything weird lately?
In person? Not really. But this was pretty weird.
14. What do you think of this quiz?
Better than average.
15. What is the last film you saw?
Clerks II--wait, that wasn't a "film". I saw the Nanny Diar... that might not be one either. The Bourne Ultimatum?
16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?
Honestly? The thrill of paying off all my debts in one day would be enough to keep me happy for at least a week of millionaire-ness.
17. Tell me something about you that I don't know:
I don't know who you are so that's a tough request. How about that my neck is all stiff and pained from sleeping bad on Tuesday night.
18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
This is a tougher question than I think it means to be. I feel like any change I would make would have a negative effect because it was made via "magic" and not through the efforts of actual people. We need to make the changes ourselves, not hope for some benevolent deity/millionaire/dictator to bestow them upon us.
19. Do you like to dance?
In public? No.
20. George Bush: .....
Utter, abject failure.
21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
Natasha
22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
Henry
23. Would you ever consider living abroad?
Sure. It'd give me serious stress but I've learned to play through my own neuroses.
24. What do you want to say to God when you reach the pearly gates?
Wouldn't a better question be, what do you want God to say to you? Because I think I'd say, "Wow, you're really here, with pearly gates? Seriously? How do I know this is a legit operation?"
1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4. What does it say?
"[it would have wrenched his] soul to have Ethan chosen last for any team. "Why?" Sarah [had asked.]
2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What's there?
The frame of the window.
3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?
Something called "Between the Lions" (I think).
4. Without looking, guess what time it is:
11:25 a.m.
5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?
11:24 a.m. The magic of billable hours makes me pretty good at that game.
6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
The copier, faintly, and a hum outside which may or may not be a rooftop a/c unit.
7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
This morning. Walking from parking to Starbucks.
8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at?
The Guebara v. Allstate case opinion.
9. What are you wearing?
Pants and a shirt. I'm at work, yo.
10. Did you dream last night?
Probably, but I don't remember any of it.
11. When did you last laugh?
About 5 minutes ago when talking about the upcoming Detroit Lions season.
12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
Zilch. I should probably hang up some stuff in here.
13. Seen anything weird lately?
In person? Not really. But this was pretty weird.
14. What do you think of this quiz?
Better than average.
15. What is the last film you saw?
Clerks II--wait, that wasn't a "film". I saw the Nanny Diar... that might not be one either. The Bourne Ultimatum?
16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?
Honestly? The thrill of paying off all my debts in one day would be enough to keep me happy for at least a week of millionaire-ness.
17. Tell me something about you that I don't know:
I don't know who you are so that's a tough request. How about that my neck is all stiff and pained from sleeping bad on Tuesday night.
18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
This is a tougher question than I think it means to be. I feel like any change I would make would have a negative effect because it was made via "magic" and not through the efforts of actual people. We need to make the changes ourselves, not hope for some benevolent deity/millionaire/dictator to bestow them upon us.
19. Do you like to dance?
In public? No.
20. George Bush: .....
Utter, abject failure.
21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
Natasha
22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
Henry
23. Would you ever consider living abroad?
Sure. It'd give me serious stress but I've learned to play through my own neuroses.
24. What do you want to say to God when you reach the pearly gates?
Wouldn't a better question be, what do you want God to say to you? Because I think I'd say, "Wow, you're really here, with pearly gates? Seriously? How do I know this is a legit operation?"
August 30, 2007
15 days
I was on a mini-whirlwind of posting for a little bit there, but then the interesting commentary dried up. I have another boring (for you) Q&A in the pipe but I figured I should break it up with a real post.
Except there's not much to say. Nothing for the blog, anyway.
They're closing the Bay Bridge for the 3-day weekend for repairs. This happened last year, and overall is a good idea (there is, astoundingly, less traffic during this weekend than any other) but it inconveniences me because my special lady friend lives on the other side. Perhaps we will each go to our respective shorelines and call out longingly. Or take BART.
Quick hits:
- Michael Vick is sort of a jerk, in general, but he seems to be taking his punishment like a man. Good.
- Goddamn Tigers take 3 of 4 against the Yankees, and then LOSE their next series against a veritable titan of baseball: the Kansas City Royals. Jesus H in a sidecar.
- I am going to have get admitted to the federal court for the Northern District of California. That shit costs $210 man! Whatever.
- Apocalypto is not as incomprehensible as I was expecting. Lacked punch at the end, though.
- How many times have I Alt-TAB'd away from my browser looking for something that is in another tab in the same browser? I have got to learn to use Ctrl-TAB. It just feels so unnatural.
Except there's not much to say. Nothing for the blog, anyway.
They're closing the Bay Bridge for the 3-day weekend for repairs. This happened last year, and overall is a good idea (there is, astoundingly, less traffic during this weekend than any other) but it inconveniences me because my special lady friend lives on the other side. Perhaps we will each go to our respective shorelines and call out longingly. Or take BART.
Quick hits:
- Michael Vick is sort of a jerk, in general, but he seems to be taking his punishment like a man. Good.
- Goddamn Tigers take 3 of 4 against the Yankees, and then LOSE their next series against a veritable titan of baseball: the Kansas City Royals. Jesus H in a sidecar.
- I am going to have get admitted to the federal court for the Northern District of California. That shit costs $210 man! Whatever.
- Apocalypto is not as incomprehensible as I was expecting. Lacked punch at the end, though.
- How many times have I Alt-TAB'd away from my browser looking for something that is in another tab in the same browser? I have got to learn to use Ctrl-TAB. It just feels so unnatural.
August 15, 2007
Stolen Stuffs
Everybody loves it when I do these, right? Well, too bad, I'm doing it anyhow. I'm fairly certain it is about twice as fun for me to write than it is for you to read, but oh well. Suck it up.
1. I've come to realize the last person who held my hand...
was my girlfriend. I don't generally hold hands with strangers. Generally.
2. I am listening to...
Nothing except NPR because I can't find my iPod cable.
3. I talk...
too much, or not enough, depending on the situation.
4. I feel...
like having a burrito for lunch.
5. My best friend(s)...
live pretty far away, and it sort of bugs me.
6. I have decided...
to run a 5 or 10k.
7. I hate it when people...
don't use their turn signals.
8. Love is...
complicated until it's not.
9. Marriage is...
not the same as a civil union.
10. Someone, somewhere is thinking...
that this question reminds me of that "Right Now" video by Van Halen.
11. I'm always...
hungry.
12. More than anything, I want...
to be financially stable.
13. My cell phone...
is... on? I don't really know what you're looking for here.
14. When I wake up in the morning...
I alternate between getting up immediately, and completely blowing it.
15. Before I go to bed at night....
I lay down. This may come as a surprise to those of you that think I sleep suspended by my feet from the ceiling, draining the blood from the body of some unlucky traveler, but it's true.
16. Right now I am thinking about...
getting something done at work. What that is, I have no idea yet.
17. Babies are...
a necessity when long-term species viability is desired.
18. I get on MySpace...
to stalk people I vaguely remember from high school. I'm not proud.
19. Today I...
believe it is Thursday.
20. Tonight I will...
work late because I gots projects, son.
21. Tomorrow I will...
go to work again, and feel sad that I have to do work on Saturday too.
22. I really want...
another chai tea from Starbucks, but I can't have one.
I'm deleting the rest of this series because they are terribly lame, and seem inappropriate given my advanced, non-high school age. You can see what they were here, though, which is where I stole them from.
1. I've come to realize the last person who held my hand...
was my girlfriend. I don't generally hold hands with strangers. Generally.
2. I am listening to...
Nothing except NPR because I can't find my iPod cable.
3. I talk...
too much, or not enough, depending on the situation.
4. I feel...
like having a burrito for lunch.
5. My best friend(s)...
live pretty far away, and it sort of bugs me.
6. I have decided...
to run a 5 or 10k.
7. I hate it when people...
don't use their turn signals.
8. Love is...
complicated until it's not.
9. Marriage is...
not the same as a civil union.
10. Someone, somewhere is thinking...
that this question reminds me of that "Right Now" video by Van Halen.
11. I'm always...
hungry.
12. More than anything, I want...
to be financially stable.
13. My cell phone...
is... on? I don't really know what you're looking for here.
14. When I wake up in the morning...
I alternate between getting up immediately, and completely blowing it.
15. Before I go to bed at night....
I lay down. This may come as a surprise to those of you that think I sleep suspended by my feet from the ceiling, draining the blood from the body of some unlucky traveler, but it's true.
16. Right now I am thinking about...
getting something done at work. What that is, I have no idea yet.
17. Babies are...
a necessity when long-term species viability is desired.
18. I get on MySpace...
to stalk people I vaguely remember from high school. I'm not proud.
19. Today I...
believe it is Thursday.
20. Tonight I will...
work late because I gots projects, son.
21. Tomorrow I will...
go to work again, and feel sad that I have to do work on Saturday too.
22. I really want...
another chai tea from Starbucks, but I can't have one.
I'm deleting the rest of this series because they are terribly lame, and seem inappropriate given my advanced, non-high school age. You can see what they were here, though, which is where I stole them from.
August 13, 2007
AdSense?
I was monkeying around with Google's AdSense (more out of curiosity than a desire or expectation of actual money) but I can't get the bastard to work.
Since I'm fairly certain Google actually owns Blogger, what the hell is going on? I paste in the code like magic and nothing. I have forgotten most of what I ever knew about scripting but this is bugging the hell out of me.
Darn! I had a whopping $0.03 coming my way, I'm sure!
Since I'm fairly certain Google actually owns Blogger, what the hell is going on? I paste in the code like magic and nothing. I have forgotten most of what I ever knew about scripting but this is bugging the hell out of me.
Darn! I had a whopping $0.03 coming my way, I'm sure!
August 8, 2007
Underwhelmed
One of the benefits to dating a woman who has a 6-year-old daughter is that the odds that I will have seen the latest craptastic kid-movie is much higher than it would normally be. This is okay by me, not only because the two of us see a great many movies on our own as well, but because sometimes there are some movies that are actually halfway decent, or dare I say, good. Like Ratatouille.
This is not about Ratatouille.
Underdog does not have a special place in my heart. I do not remember the cartoon, I do not largely care about flying superhero dogs (this includes Krypto, by the way) because it seems like a waste to give superhuman powers to a creature that lacks opposable thumbs. I am however a fan of the Underdog theme song, so there's that.
Most of the youth-oriented movies I am "forced" to see aren't actually all that bad. I get to avoid the seriously deranged (Happy Feet) and the too-pathetic-even-for-a-kid (Bratz). But I did see Underdog last weekend, and I'm sad to say that it was not good. Even from a "dumb kids' movie" perspective.
First of all, what the hell are Underdog's powers? If you have a superhero movie, you have to explain this. Somehow. They explained where he got them (DNA splicing, and I'll ignore the fact that splicing in eagle DNA would not give a non-winged creature flight) but never what they really were. Strength, to be sure, and flight. And super-hearing and speed -- he flies around the world fast enough to catch a frisbee from the opposite direction. That's seriously fast.
But then, Underdog uses his skills in wildly incongruous ways. He seems to be invulnerable -- he can survive a fall from high-Earth orbit -- but 4 sticks of dynamite seem to scare him off. I am not a physicist, but I am pretty sure that if you can survive the extreme stresses of atmospheric reentry, a bundle of TNT isn't going to faze you. The writers routinely seemed to forget what their creation was capable of solely to make cheap (and incredibly lame) jokes.
This may seem like much ado about nothing. It IS a kid's movie, after all. But to me, the most serious violation of a science fiction or fantasy work is when said work violates its own rules. You have to play in the fake universe you create--failing to do so means not only have you made a poorly-scripted and plot-hole-ridden movie, but it's undeniably stupid to boot.
And what the hell happened to Jason Lee? I think I liked him better when he was just a Kevin Smith misanthrope.
This is not about Ratatouille.
Underdog does not have a special place in my heart. I do not remember the cartoon, I do not largely care about flying superhero dogs (this includes Krypto, by the way) because it seems like a waste to give superhuman powers to a creature that lacks opposable thumbs. I am however a fan of the Underdog theme song, so there's that.
Most of the youth-oriented movies I am "forced" to see aren't actually all that bad. I get to avoid the seriously deranged (Happy Feet) and the too-pathetic-even-for-a-kid (Bratz). But I did see Underdog last weekend, and I'm sad to say that it was not good. Even from a "dumb kids' movie" perspective.
First of all, what the hell are Underdog's powers? If you have a superhero movie, you have to explain this. Somehow. They explained where he got them (DNA splicing, and I'll ignore the fact that splicing in eagle DNA would not give a non-winged creature flight) but never what they really were. Strength, to be sure, and flight. And super-hearing and speed -- he flies around the world fast enough to catch a frisbee from the opposite direction. That's seriously fast.
But then, Underdog uses his skills in wildly incongruous ways. He seems to be invulnerable -- he can survive a fall from high-Earth orbit -- but 4 sticks of dynamite seem to scare him off. I am not a physicist, but I am pretty sure that if you can survive the extreme stresses of atmospheric reentry, a bundle of TNT isn't going to faze you. The writers routinely seemed to forget what their creation was capable of solely to make cheap (and incredibly lame) jokes.
This may seem like much ado about nothing. It IS a kid's movie, after all. But to me, the most serious violation of a science fiction or fantasy work is when said work violates its own rules. You have to play in the fake universe you create--failing to do so means not only have you made a poorly-scripted and plot-hole-ridden movie, but it's undeniably stupid to boot.
And what the hell happened to Jason Lee? I think I liked him better when he was just a Kevin Smith misanthrope.
August 2, 2007
Fast Break!
I saw Harry Potter Number 5 on Saturday. I also bought a couch. They were both darker than I expected. I was happy to see that the director toned down the angsty teenageness of Harry from the book. It's the last Harry Potter book I've read (two behind!) and the reason was that Harry was so bloody annoying. "Boo hoo, nobody likes me, even my friends." What a pain in the ass.
Those Cingular commercials, where the people get dropped calls right before a big revelation or response? Those are funny. What's really funny is that I have Cingular, and while it's true they don't drop calls much, I have a helluva time even making a call at least 40% of the time. So there's a fun twist.
I had to select a primary care physician for my health insurance here at work. I have no idea how to do that, so I just picked one with a good doctor-sounding name: "Birnbaum". I will probably go in for a physical at some point, since it has been 5+ years since my last. Strong like bull!
Everybody is popping out kids and getting married! You know who you are. Congrats to all on the impending nuptials/squalling infants. I am not doing either at this time and that is fine by me. It was hard enough to pick out a damn couch.
I have not seen The Simpsons movie yet. This pains me. But I did check the total scores from my Movie List today and it turns out I've seen 70 movies from 2005. I attribute this largely to my severe unemployment during 2006, which allowed a great deal of Netflixing to occur. My list may be faltering because it indicates only 17 movies in '07, and I think that 7 months in (the sevens are starting to freak me out...) that is on the low side.
I haven't read a really great book in awhile. Nothing worth mentioning. I will dig some out from the books my mom gave us while in Michigan and see if something interesting appears.
Those Cingular commercials, where the people get dropped calls right before a big revelation or response? Those are funny. What's really funny is that I have Cingular, and while it's true they don't drop calls much, I have a helluva time even making a call at least 40% of the time. So there's a fun twist.
I had to select a primary care physician for my health insurance here at work. I have no idea how to do that, so I just picked one with a good doctor-sounding name: "Birnbaum". I will probably go in for a physical at some point, since it has been 5+ years since my last. Strong like bull!
Everybody is popping out kids and getting married! You know who you are. Congrats to all on the impending nuptials/squalling infants. I am not doing either at this time and that is fine by me. It was hard enough to pick out a damn couch.
I have not seen The Simpsons movie yet. This pains me. But I did check the total scores from my Movie List today and it turns out I've seen 70 movies from 2005. I attribute this largely to my severe unemployment during 2006, which allowed a great deal of Netflixing to occur. My list may be faltering because it indicates only 17 movies in '07, and I think that 7 months in (the sevens are starting to freak me out...) that is on the low side.
I haven't read a really great book in awhile. Nothing worth mentioning. I will dig some out from the books my mom gave us while in Michigan and see if something interesting appears.
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